Are your health & fitness goals your compass?
Today my goals are my compass. They are the mountains in the distance, reminding me I’m going the right way.
After losing nearly 135 pounds, my perspective on my health, fitness, and goals has completely changed.
My mission is to live the most extended, most vibrant life possible. To show up for myself, my wife, and my kids with joy and excitement. For my kids to not experience the pain, I went through of losing a parent at 25 years old.
In the past, my goals were a destination I was fixating on in the distant future, my salvation, and the eventual source of my happiness. My goals were my perceived escape from my suffering and a distraction from the current moment. A reminder that I need to be anywhere but right here, right now.
Today my goals are my compass. They are the mountains in the distance, reminding me I’m going the right way.
If I look up and find my fitness efforts oriented to the beach instead of the mountains, I know I need to pause and work with my inner child.
Looking good at the beach used to be one of my big motivators.
It was all about NOT feeling rejected—a desire to be desired.
Something my little boy in me needed and could not get.
Every past weight loss attempt was about some version of looking good, and the beach is the perfect analogy because it's a once or twice-a-year thing for me—a massive build-up for a small moment in time.
Will the beach happen at some point this year?
Yes!
But that's not what my journey is about anymore.
The wounded boy in me sometimes still thinks it is.
It's my job to remind him that's not the why behind this journey.
That's where my mountain analogy comes in.
Though the boy in me craves the validation of looking good at the beach, he needs me to lead him to the top of the mountain.
When I inevitably catch myself looking up and looking towards the beach and not the mountains - all is not lost.
It's just a pointer to remind me to tend to the boy in me.
And then pause, pivot, and point back toward the mountain I want to climb this summer.
And then focus on the day-to-day tasks.
Going to yoga
Breathwork
Fasting
Playing with my kids
My writing, etc., etc.
Ironically, my day at the beach will still come, but its gravity on me will be much less.
The joy of living in the moment has dwarfed the gravity of looking good at the beach.
The joy caught in the moment of the picture at the top of this post.
Read my full article on fitness goals and mindset.